gregoryant's Xanga

Graduating from RI, to RI, and Rafflesian Spotlight '09

Sat, 07 Nov 2009 18:06:56 GMT

To be very honest, the 1 month between the last blog post and this one, is solely because I have a phobia of starting a blogpost and never ending it (considering how long-winded I can get). Too many things have been happening, or not (for certain manifestations of evil i.e. EOYs), and I just didn't know where to start.

and then I realised that I've survived 4 years of RI, the school and home that I thought I despised so much and wanted to leave for the past 2 years. It just makes me feel really weird, that after countless blogposts lamenting my miserable school life, I'd still miss certain things after all. I mean, sure we're technically not going anywhere, 'cept the campus a tad further away, and we're still living with the same name. (not even RI(JC) anymore, wonderful, so I get to stay in RI and feel old.)

(I think I forgot to mention that I'm not leaving for Canada after all.)

HOKAY, back to the last week of school that I wanted to blog about. Ignoring the various disappointing marks I have obtained, it's been quite an internally emotional week, which culminated during the batch song in the final assembly. I don't know why, but the line that strikes me the most in our Batch song is the 2nd line in the verse. "we feel the beating of our hearts together." Not a very special line at all looking at it like this, I know, but it's just my personal opinion.

I never really felt anything for our batch -- we're the batch that didn't win any SYF Gold with Honours, the batch whose year had swine flu getting in the way, the batch that had hardly any House events 'cept the measly Holympics, the batch that led a not-so spectacular Sec 1 Orientation Camp. There were so imperfect moments, but perhaps that's that makes me miss this batch the most. (again, I know we're still in the same school, but with floods of new people rushing in next year, it'll be different.)

4C
(I'm not sure if you'll read this, but if you do... maybe leave a tag? :D)

I haven't been the most sociable person around in class. I got kind of sad/guilty/unsure yesterday when I read the nice little notes everyone wrote for me. You guys told me to stay strong, and that you're sorry that you didn't get to know me well enough, and some of you say that it's because you're not that good at communicating. But I do think I was at fault for always shutting myself out from the class most of the time, and I feel the sting now. I must be honest here -- I didn't feel comfortable many a time in class, probably because I felt inferior to most of you. It's heartening to know that some of you respect me for taking up positions and responsibilities, but on another hand, I'm not sure if I deserve that respect. As I mentioned during English class the other day, with Mrs Seow, I'd choose a different path with zero leadership roles, perhaps that'd bring me down to earth and allow me to have known you guys better. But right now, I just want to thank all of you for the fun and laughter you've added to my life, the care and concern you guys have showered me when I was down (whenever I failed something, for example. ... D: ), and the unwavering support for my singing (haha sounds weird phrased like this) ! :D

Okay I'm not so good with words, so I don't know what else to write here. ): I'll be looking forward to grad night.

House Capts

Too bad Hao Zhi and Jiarong aren't in this photo.

House stuff has been quite an integral part of 2009 for me I guess (notice how I don't say Hullett, but House? haha.) Curses to H1N1 for surfacing in our year, and causing so many events to be cancelled/disrupted. I was really looking forward to the competition between the houses, but it turned out really minimal. But anyway I really wanna thank you guys for the help/support you've offered to me this year. (:

OIP Korea peeps :D
(special mention keke.)

I'm really glad to have known you guys! 2009 allowed me to get to know some of you even more. i.e. Davin, Shaun (who insists, is taller than me), Yong Han, Sheryin (who's not in the pic), etc.

SIGH so there goes Year 4 of RI. Regrets? Plenty, of course. But I shan't think about them right now.

Looking forward to Grad Night, minus the theme.

Rafflesian Spotlight '09

so I got 2nd place for the 2nd time. I thought Chia would win, in fact, but he got 3rd. haha but I guess we'll have to accept that! I need to thank everyone who came down to show your support, I really appreciate it. Hope my performance wasn't too boring.

Chia's God Bless the Broken Road

(I'd never be able to do what Chia did playing the piano and singing.)

CHIA. if you read this: THANK YOU for the guidance and support you've given me as a fellow competitor, since you like to correct me when I can't hit a note/sing off key.

Okay if you haven't noticed, I'm getting increasingly incoherent due to the time (2.50AM, wtf.) so I'm just going to spam photos, and give one liner thanks. (:

my best friends Daron and Shayne, for the support. (or for shayne, THE LACK OF A PIANIST THIS YEAR. if you don't get your A1 for your chinese on tuesday, I'll laugh.) (: and daron, for the "prissy" facebook group (those who get the reference, <3) that you created.

15th SLC Andromedae peeps + their random friends I need to thank but I don't know who/how exactly.
THANK YOU FOR COMING. really appreciate it. (: but shuqing/shiauyin/eben I'll remember that y'all escaped too early.

Laura! For managing to rush down for RS after all~ haha thanks for bugs bunny balloon. (: the ears are rly quite cute.

My family, aunty Michelle, mum and lou dao who flew from. was it Hong Kong or Jkt. I have no idea. Thanks for the fake roses! :D

4C!! for your support for chia and I. :D can't thank you guys more.

Everyone in this facebook group. Haha it was really awkward at first when I got to know of its existence. (it still is.) Don't think they'd read my blog, but if you do, THANK YOU.

I guess people wonder why I'd choose that song that day, since it's "rather boring".

haha keep wondering~

prometheum day

Tue, 06 Oct 2009 08:43:44 GMT

a year has slapped us in the faces and moved on.
it felt a little weird today, i'm not sure how to describe that feeling.

anyway, I was shortlisted for being a facilitator for OIP. according to Nick I was posted to India.
but because of my French immersion leaving on the 22nd next month, I can't go!
ohwell, it's a bit of a pity.

SIGH there's Research Education congress tomorrow.
-reserves comments-.

To lighten things up a little, here's what Mush and I agreed on for our CLE poster (in which we were to choose a value from the Rafflesian Principle of Honour.) ... I hope we fulfilled the requirements.

It's eye catching all right.

051009

Mon, 05 Oct 2009 12:19:06 GMT

and so we got third last Saturday, for our Lit dramatization. a little tinge of disappointment, but the deserving teams won 1st/2nd so we've gotten over it. :D here's another shout out to thank my fellow team mates in making this Literature task a success.

today was rather uplifting, upon realization that my CA marks aren't so bad after all for *certain* subjects. brings me hope for a better.. GPA at the end of this year. woohoo.

and then there was the career forum after school, which was rather bizarre. went for architecture, which was pretty cool looking at the designs by the architect Mr Ang. but he couldn't answer the question about whether your Physics needs to be good if you want to take up architecture.

wait. I don't even take physics.

mush and I then went for the medicine talk by a Dr Yeo. it was quite interesting at first, and then things got gloomier by the second upon my epiphany that "once I'm done studying medicine, I'd be ancient.".

not bothering about my career to-be for now.
EOYS!!

pak-kak

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 12:42:12 GMT

just missing Ian in the photo.

Gulliver's Travels dramatization next week! :D

I know it doesn't quite show in the photo, but I'm playing Lilliput (wow surprise much?) and I'll be shorter than ever. How I'm doing this impossible task is still a secret. ... for now.

Mush, no surprise again, is playing Indian. Just a male one for once.

There's Kai Tsi, who might just be stripped on stage again like last year (albeit accidentally back then.)

Daron, who's guest starring as the Sun.

Richard, as GULLIVER aka all of us combined + Swift. One word: Confused.

Tiong who, contrary to his look in the photo, is wise.

Nicholas Quah (yes all of you Quah stalkers, THE nick quah) is our director!

And Ian as our awesome tech in charge!

____

This is where I tried having comparison photos for Daron and Richard, who happen to look like a contestant from a certain reality show.

edit: I managed to do it.

scary.
____

There was this.. dead rat we noticed outside the Junior Block today. It got ran over by a car.
Damn sick/ sad man. All you drivers out there'd better watch out, don't overlook small things. Cough.

To quote a good friend of mine, "You dare knock me down?"

23 DAYS LEFT.

Wed, 23 Sep 2009 14:49:18 GMT

Hi.

I've been wanting to post for quite some time already, but I somehow lose that -I'mgonnawritesomethinggood- feeling pretty fast. Not that it's a bad thing, I've been trying to focus on studying for EOYs these days. Which reminds me, that I should really adopt the habit of studying outside home, away from the computer (fb/youtube, where I can find all the new shows that are out this Fall), the tv and my best friend - my bed. I spent the long weekend in Starbucks for once, and even though it burnt a hole in my pocket, I guess I studied better there.

Not to forget I saw Tabitha from Singapore Idol, who's (:D :D :D)-ly pretty but irritatingly tall.

Bryan Chia called me the other night to ask about some sleepover, and it felt pretty weird talking to him after eons (even though we tweet). We ended up talking for pretty long, or maybe just a lot on his part. Hm some things he mentioned got me thinking, like what he said about his friends in ri(jc) and all that, and what he missed about ri.

I don't quite know how to describe this feeling, is it disappointment? It's when you realize that someone you respected/looked up to as a senior, or maybe someone you tried to model yourself after, turns out to be not as perfect as you thought he'd be. Yeah we talk about how everyone has imperfections and all that all the time, but the disappointment will still be there. I never realized how a senior can actually have such a huge impact on juniors. What Zaki said to me earlier this year during the SYF period makes even more sense now -- that he'd rather be a friend than a senior who shows concern for a moment and forgets you the moment he has something more important in his life.

Sigh. I'm not quite sure how I've influenced others these past few years.

I was just thinking the other day: looking back at CAP '08, DF, and so many other things. In all the stress I had, all the frustration I felt with myself, I lost quite a few friends I had. I lost my temper countless times this year because of DI, and it affected my friendship with a few people, teammates or non teammates. (Am talking about juniors, none from my batch. If you get what I'm referring to within these brackets, well done, friend.)

Should make up for my mistakes before it's too late.

DMP's quite buh nowadays. I mean, yeah okay I understand what you're coming from about providing "AT RISK" students (so to speak) with rooms to study in for the free periods.

Well maybe you should UNLOCK THE DOORS FIRST?

Announced to the Hullett 2010 captains, who the House Captain is, finally today. Here's wishing Ernest, Ryan Seah, Uday, Kevin and captain Xuan Ru all the best for next year. (:

Prometheum Day's in week 4!

I will resist the urge to complain about the Literature department's decision to have a dramatization of our Lit text 2 weeks before the End of Years, or their decision for choosing Gulliver's Travels as a text in the very first place. I shan't complain that my Lit essays are getting extremely and ridiculously low marks.

I don't like garden gnomes OR shadows, thank you very much.

I haven't decided whether or not to join Rafflesian Spotlight again this year. It's gonna be something I'd look forward to, but I'm just not sure if it'll be fair/extra of me to join again.

Singapore Idol today was pretty uninteresting, I expected so much more out of the song choices (which I've heard, aren't entirely by the contestants themselves, but the mediacorp producers instead (-.-'') ) Some were pretty good, like Tabitha :D and Sylvia for the girls, and Justin (HE'S HALF INDONESIAN TOO) and surprisingly Duane, the fellow '93-born person for the guys. Farhan deserves to be shot (or maybe just the fans.) so that's that. I don't believe Mae (the 6 time Australian Idol reject) would choose Lady Marmalade. That's just absurd.

Syltra deserved to stay longer than Farhan!

TIME TO STUDY! :D

bye.

(ps. 23 days, not 22 because CHEMISTRY is more impt than english/ss, which I am ignoring.)

2 things shaken off.

Tue, 15 Sep 2009 13:49:49 GMT

Today I bade farewell to 2 rather important things.

i. there was my last Hullett house meeting.
Regrets? A few. Disappointment? Yeah.
But hey, what in 2009 actually went well?
Ugh never mind, shan't say anything else..

ii. french marks.

oh well. iii. gpa.

why can't I take the O's instead, argh @*&#!(@#@.

>= (

biology and mathematics night.

before I step into school for term 4.

Sun, 13 Sep 2009 15:30:00 GMT

... just a little post about the Sept hols. For once we didn't head to Hong Kong, 'cause I had THE math cct on Monday morn, and my mum decided she needed to watch over me while I study. Dad came over for a while, went down to Jakarta for a few days, then came back here for the rest of the hols, leaving earlier yesterday.

The math cct was actually great, apart from one 5 mark question that I blanked out for and realized how to do it a little too late. I hope I wasn't too careless or anything. That was Monday. Anyway after the test I mugged Bio at Bishan library before heading down to Boon Lay to meet Shawn who was, surprisingly, willing to go to the Army open house.

... My mum insisted that I went, so I did. "In case you're really going to Canada, know something about the Army!" since I'm coming back for it ANYWAY. haha.

Open House was actually fun. Like the flying fox-

I was surprisingly good at the shooting range and shot all 5 targets, while Shawn got 2. :D He got kinda jealous.

The rest of open house was cool.

Anyway.

Saturday was more eventful! Went to Daron's house in the morn for a Lit dramatization meeting. Arrived 20 minutes late (unsurprisingly) only to find out that the only other member who had arrived, was Richard! And uh. We waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And then Kai Tsi and Quah finally arrived and so we discussed out Gulliver's Travels drama.

THEN I went to Somerset to meet my parents, 'cause there was some Canadian School convention thingy. Turned out to be a really small scale event, and the schools were rather. Unknown. Plus they were mostly University crash courses, like: study for 9 months and get into university right after that! Not my thing.

Bus-ed to Suntec after that, went to Comex which was ridiculously crowded. I uh. Kind of scolded the people who cleverly gathered to talk at the end of an escalator. And I got an EOS 500D!! with free printer, tripod stand, among other things. :D paid for online warranty and got a crumpler camera bag. woohoo. my first dslr.

met up with uncle ahkoon and family (frm indonesia) at paragon after that.

varrell is too cute.

vania's getting very cheeky.

varrell is amazingly sociable too -- he approached other-random-baby-girl from the table next to us. and they clicked!

... until he whacked her in the face (I hope accidentally)

The two kids were running about playing hide and seek outside Fish n Co after that. grrr I had to make sure Varrell wouldn't fall down. Uh in the above picture. ... It's not counted as falling down. He probably didn't want me to carry him 'cause he got scared of my specs. I think.

OKAY that's it for sept hols '09.

time for term 4. DMP period = revision.

5 weeks to EOYS, 9 weeks to HCL O's and Grad night.
10 WEEKS TO FRANCE WOOHOOO.

broken strings

Sun, 06 Sep 2009 14:49:34 GMT

(no daron this ain't a reference to rise.)

(but anyway sorry once again that I couldn't attend mesmerise!)

should've discovered this song earlier, I like it so much.

broken strings by james morrison.

_____________________________

math test tomorrow morning. time to.. stop panicking.

schedule for tomorrow: math test, self study in bishan, then to boonlay to meet shawn :D haha to go to the army open house. all 'cause the mother says i've to at least know about the army in case i really leave for canada.

RAGE XIV went all right, 'cept the emceeing (which was what I did with nick quah). haha but I had fun.

You can't play our broken strings
You can't feel anything
That your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that ain't real

it's okay.

Wed, 02 Sep 2009 10:34:07 GMT

that's from monday's class bbq at daron's place. spent more time in the pool than anything else though.

anyway.

i'll say it's okay even though I really think it's not okay, because if I tell you it's not okay, it'll really make things not okay, and then I won't be okay, which is worse than the 'okay' i'm feeling right now. or maybe not. but then again bottling things up never seems to work. that's not okay. so fine. it's slightly not okay that things aren't going okay. but I have to tell myself okay, so that it'll really turn out okay. low gpa, it's okay. screwed up essays, it's okay. not satisfied, it's okay.

just breathe and take all these in, don't spit 'em out, just internalize everything, take everything in your stride.

maybe things will turn out okay after all.

________________________________________________

have you ever felt like you suddenly miss people that have appeared and disappeared in your life?

people you don't know too well, who don't know you that well either. but you've shared some really memorable moments that you can't forget. the thing is you've only met once, and you clutch this piece of memory in your hands ever so tightly, so tightly that you're afraid to let go because maybe the moment you let go, this piece of memory might just disappear into nothingness.

that's how much i want to go back to Korea.

________________________________________________

un mois.

Tue, 25 Aug 2009 14:59:06 GMT

You can say that I've been avoiding this space, or you can say that I've been too caught up with life to update at all. Another month has come and gone (exactly a month since I last posted (if that's even counted)) and as clichéd as it may sound, so many things have happened.

Because my brain is currently as untidy as my study table, I'll just lump everything into chunks.

1. Most recently and significantly, of course, would be today's Higher Chinese prelims, which is also known as the prelude to the culmination of 10 years of learning Chinese. I didn't exactly study way beforehand for this, but I found the paper quite all right. Results-wise, who knows what goes through the teachers' minds? So I'm just hoping for the best. 正所谓：“往者不可谏，来者犹可追”, I'll just have to work on whatever comes my way and do my best for the O's in November.

2. Since earlier on this month, I've been having the Korean fever. (Actually since last year's OIP trip. But still.) SNSD has the cutest things on earth.

3. Had my oral defence for English a few weeks back. Come to think of it, I'm questioning what I said about what I've gotten out of the raffles programme. It's really weird -- I'm supposed to list out things that I've learnt from the programme, whether I like or not? What logic is that? But anyway I did speak my mind on some things (though I discovered I said I "didn't like" too many things after that. =/) and I'm hoping my marks are decent.. Hmm but I do think it's interesting to see what my other friends have to say 'bout their journey..

4. 9 more weeks of RI?

5. 7 weeks to EOY. ...

6. Oh yeah. RI makes me question my own intellectual capacity -- and I don't mean specifically the curriculum, or anything. But hey, find nicer terms to label students if you must. Saying that people are "overall at risk" isn't the best complement around. And if any of you out there are actually wondering what I'm talking about, here's the deal, I'm not even going to pretend that I'm going to avoid those question marks above your head: I've a GPA below 3, and because of that, my DMP period has been miraculously transformed into an intensive revision course! This amazing package includes remedials from Biology to English (?!?!?!!!!) even if I'm actually fine in the subject. I didn't get to choose a single DMP course, but hey, it's okay, I'm digesting/have digested my anger/frustration and hence shall not complain anymore. But yeah, go on and talk about how I'm dumb and everything if you want, 'cause it won't last. -inserts random inspirational shiz for self and keeps positive attitude as advised from Mr Happy (I wonder if someone will get this)- I'll study hard for the EOYs anyway. That kinda goes without saying, right?

7. LOOKING FORWARD TO END-OF-YEAR. Chinese O's included! 'cause there'll be Graduation Night, (Mush, this is where we can say our favorite line.) and then I *may* be off for OIP as a Facil, and then France. FRANCE. Did that sink in? FRANCE?! too exciting. What's after that, is still the unknown, but I'm hoping for something good too.

8. No, wait. About my GPA, by saying it's below 3, I'm not saying it's close to 2 either. Freakin' MATH that just has to be double weightage. Note to juniors if you actually see this: Never ever ever ever decide to not practise Math in Sec 2/3 or you'll die in Sec 4. Been there done that. I'm such a bad role model.

9. I think I should sleep now and study my butt off tomorrow.

for the first time in a long time, good night.